How do you know when its time to hang up trying to save your marriage?
October 19th, 2009 by admin | Filed in Save My Marriage
I have been married for almost 8 years, there has been steady problems since the beginning. He always makes it out to be my fault cause he says I have a "bad attitude". Only I feel my attitude is because of how I am treated. Cheated on, lied too. I have 2 kids and I’m fed up I"m just not sure I could leave.
Tags: 8 years, bad attitude, marriage
time to pack it up girl. Do you really want this life for your 2 children. Should they grow up thinking daddies are supposed to act this way? what if they act this way when they are older? this would be heartbreaking. find a better life. It’s a little scary, but well worth it. Do you have family that can help you?
the cheated on and lied to would have done it for me
You just know when you have reached the end. At least thats how it was for me!
Get your finances sorted out and leave. You are in an abusive relationship and deserve better.
I think you should have left a long time ago.
If you feel that you still love him, can forgive him and can move past what he did, then it’s not time to hang up – it’s time to seek counseling.
If you can’t move past it, find a lawyer and get a divorce.
Either way you do this, this guy is an asshole. It just depends if you see him as YOUR asshole (i.e. you still love him) or just a plain asshole.
If you’re not sure you can leave, you’re not ready to hang it up…
When you’re done, you’ll know it.
If he’s cheating, then blaming you is just his stupidity and lack of maturity in the relationship. He should accept his responsibility in the deal. I would have a bad attitude too. If you can’t leave, then you have to decide if you can live like you are living. Those are really your only two options if he’s blaming you. If you can’t get him into counseling where someone can tell him what a butt he’s being, then it’s as simple as take it or leave. (Chances are if you leave, he’ll see where he messed up. Sometimes it takes that for someone to realize.)
lol u got cheated on and you’re still around? desperate much?
About abuse…How are you affected?
* Are you unable or afraid to make decisions for yourself?
* Do you do anything you can to please your partner or not upset him?
* Do you make excuses for your partner’s behaviour?
* Are you forgetful, confused or unable to concentrate?
* Have you noticed changes in your eating, sleeping, alcohol or drug use?
* Have you lost interest or energy to do the things you used to?
* Do you feel sick, anxious, tired or depressed a lot of the time?
* Have you lost contact with your friends, family or neighbours?
* Have you lost self-confidence and feel afraid that you could not make it alone?
What can you do about it?
* Realize that emotional abuse is a serious problem and you can get help.
* Recognize that emotional abuse is as bad or worse than physical abuse.
* Take your own safety and the safety of your children seriously.
* Know that emotional abuse can lead to physical violence or death.
* Know that you are not to blame for your partner’s abusive behaviour.
* Find people to talk to that can support you. Consider going for counselling.
* Do not give up if community professionals are not helpful. Keep looking for Someone that will listen to you and take emotional abuse seriously.
* Recognize that you have the right to make your own decisions, in your own time, and that dealing with any form of abuse may take time.
* Trust yourself and your own experiences. Believe in your own strengths. Remember that you are your own best source of knowledge and strength, and that you already have the tools you need to survive.
Where can you turn to?
* Women’s help lines are for you too. Find the number in the front of your phone book.
* Shelters do accept women who are emotionally abused and have not been physically abused. The help line can refer you to the one nearest you. Use the Bell Relay Service if they do not have a TTY. If you have a disability, ask where there is an accessible shelter in your area.
* If you have been threatened with harm or death, or are being stalked (followed and harassed) by your partner or ex-partner, you can call the police. Dial 911, or if you are in a rural area, find out the emergency number.
* If you are considering leaving, especially if you have children, see a lawyer. In Ontario you can call, 1-800-268-8326, for referrals to a lawyer and be entitled to a free half-hour visit.
* Abused women are at the greatest risk of being harmed or killed when they leave. Ensure that you have a safety plan in place.
If you are asking this question this it’s time. Only you know how much you can put up with. A person has their limits and it seems that you reached yours. I would have a bad attitude to if I was cheated on, lied to and who knows what else. Only you can make that decision. The best of luck to you.