How can I make my wife to be in love with me again?
October 21st, 2009 by admin | Filed in Save My Marriage
We have four great kids and married 13 years (together 16.5). Too much to throw away. What is it that makes a woman fall in love again with the same man? I love my family.
Tags: 13 years, love, Man Love, woman fall
BOTH partners should:
- Always be happy to see the person when you come home at th e end of the day. The interaction you have in the first 5 minutes will set the mood for the whole night. If you’re home and you are watching TV and your wife is coming home from work and you just glance at the door and say "hey" then that’s not good. Same if she does it to you. When I hear my fiance coming home I hear the lock and I jump up and run to the door to greet him. The other days of the week, he gets home before me, so I call him and tell him which bus I’m on and he’ll meet me at the bus stop and walk me home.
- The person who gets home first should always look around the house and make sure it’s at least a little bit clean. Make the bed, run the dishes, vacuum, and wait for the other person to come home. Of course you should rest too, but if you have time try and clean up a bit. Definately don’t make any MORE messes. She shouldn’t either. Of course, every once in a while it’s ok – you can’t expect perfection 100 % of the time.
- Ideally you could take turns cooking , or if one of you hates to cook, the one NOT cooking should do the dishes, take the trash down, etc. etc.
- Both of you should surprise eachother once in awhile. Since you both work you both have money. She can buy you your favorite fast food or a video game ; you can buy her flowers or a new dress.
- When one of you wants to complain about your day; the other should listen.. Some days she might have a bad day and want you to draw her a bath.. other days you might have a hard day and need a foot rub..
- If there are kids, both of you should take turns to watch the kids while the other partner can go out with friends. At least once a week get a babysitter and go out alone. At least once a week go out somewhere as a family – even if it’s just to McDonald’s or to the store.
- Always make sure things are equal. I usually don’t cook, I clean only about half the time, do the laundry about half the time, and I hate running errands and taking down the trash. In return I make sure the bills are paid, appointments are made, help my fiance do his homework when he doesn’t have time, I bring him a cold drink in the shower when he comes home from work, etc. etc.
You can’t make her. Try remembering what turned her on in the beginning.
You should get married again or take her out to dinner
You can’t make someone love you to be honest.
It’s not all that difficult. Try a little romance and consideration. Treat her like you did when you were dating. Make her feel special. Love doesn’t really die, it just becomes malnourished—starved.
Read "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus" – you’ll gain a lot of insight (and encourage your wife to read it too).
no hope of it
go to bar, get with a young cutie
Be thoughtful and romantic. Tell her each day that you love her.
Bring back the love!
You can’t make someone love you, but you can try to fix the issues that are causing the problems. Maybe you two should go into counseling to address the issues that are tearing you two apart.
Maybe you need to ask yourself why she fell out of love in the first place. People change and grow, sometimes in opposite directions.
Every woman has "nagged about what they want"…give it to her. Most men don’t even TRY to win their wives love til she has already given up and asked for a divorce. I’m not sure of your situation. If she wants OUT…let her. If she hasn’t asked for an amlicable divorce yet…try courting her in the way that she has always imagined. Does she read romance novels? What are the types of romantic movies? Pay attention to what she says during movies, tv sitcoms, commercials, etc. PPL say what they are looking for all the time with that simple phrase "oh, wasn’t that exciting" or " wish that would happen to me"…"would love to have that"…and get it for her. Ask her friends…they ALWAYS know…good luck!
romance her, wine and dine her, talk to her, call her during the day and tell her you love her,write her love notes, send her letters in the mail and have her check the mail. talk long walks, set up dates for you and her. buy her gifts and diliver them to her job, make lunch dates, take a vaca with only her, make dinner for her instead of having her do it. good luck.
Do little sweet things for her. Leave her a flower one day, or call her just to tell her how much you care about her. Maybe she would like if you helped out around the house more… do the dishes for her. Offer her a foot massage if she tells you she’s tired. Just try to be considerate and romantic. Show her how much you appreciate her.
Atention… all women need atention ,love and atention ! You man forget about how to give atention to a women after you marrie her !!!Don’t give up !!
Try to show her your love and tell her !!
Good luck !
Try doing some of the things you did at the begining of your relationship.
I wonder if my husband cares whether I still love him as well. He and I are truly going through it. However, I believe he no longer loves me and wants out but doesn’t know how to.
Romance her. Take her out on dates, maybe recreate a special date you had years ago. Surprise her with candle light bubble baths, flowers, love letters, affection, flirting….
Make her feel special. Take her on a mini vacation for a night or two.
i don’t know your situation but try taking her to where you first met. if you have four children maybe she needs to get away from all the commitments. try going on vacation for a week far far away. make her feel like the greatest woman on earth like she is queen, flattery is nice as long as it is sincere, maybe she just needs some pampering to feel special again. good luck to you
Think back to what you did, behaved when you first met 13 yrs ago. Do some of those things again. Treat her like a queen. she will see that you really love her and are trying.
GOOD Luck.
* flowers delivered wouldnt hurt, write her cute notes and leave them in her purse, on her pillow, take some of her lipstick and write I love you on the bathroom mirror before she gets up in the am.Make her breakfast. massage her feet. rub her head….get the picture…
whoever said chivalry is dead is wrong. do nice things for her, take her out to a fancy restaurant, buy her flowers/get her a gift for no reason. try a little romance. become a newlywed all over again. you could try reenacting the day you met, or your first date.
hope I’ve helped you out some
Woo her! Tell her why you love her. Make her feel special. Call her just to tell her you love her. Make her coffee in the morning before you go to work. Do the things you know she hates to do, just because she hates to do them! THAT shows her that you love her. Be the one to unload the dishwasher or take out the trash without her having to ask. It might seem simple, but that is what women really want.It makes them feel that they are the loved and treasured spouse, not just the maid and care taker. Oh, and don’t be looking for kudos for doing it, because that takes away any specialness. Do it because she is the most important person in your life and you love her-not because you want to "earn points" and let her"see" how good you are. Take a minute and tell her she is the best thing that has ever happened to you and that your life would never be the same if she was not in it. And mean it. Tell her-every single day-that you appreciate how hard she works to take care of the family. It’s a thankless job, you know, and when your spouse stops and takes notice of how much you do, it makes you look at them in a different light!
I overheard my husband tell our teenage daughter the other night that it was NOT ok for her to upset me because I was the love of his life and it was never ok to him to upset the love of his life. We have been married 20 years and he couldn’t have made me fall in love all over with him any faster if he had tried.
It’s the little things that count. So start doing some little things and before you know it, they will be big things!
you can’t make her do anything. remember what you two did in the begining of the relationship and try to bring that back. you need to talk to her. If my husband actually would treat me like he did in the very begining I’d be all over him. I’ve told him so a million times and it lasts for 10 seconds. If he’d keep it up I wouldn’t be looking for a new place to live.
There is always a special something that makes people fall in love with each other. Sometimes one is more in love than the other. When you are married for quite a while, everything slows down, and you fall into a sort of rut. It is up to both of you to step out of it and remember the things that put you together in the first place. I find an important thing for married couples is a date night. Everyone wants to feel special. Even if you just go for a walk and have coffee afterwards, just the idea of talking to each other without the kids around can be wonderful. Be careful not to talk about bills, money, kids, etc. Talk about each other and plan vacations and good times. The feeling will come back.. Treat your wife as the sexy woman she is and maybe even that will come back. I am happy to hear that this time it is the husband who wants to make things better, It is usually the other way around. Bring home some flowers, not just for her but for both of you. Good luck.
I feel that a man thinks his wife is like his mother in terms of taking care of him. She’s not your mother…remember that and take that into consideration.
Oh hun, I truly don’t think after all this time being together that she doesn’t love you anymore. You just need to bring the "spark" back into the relationship. After a while both parties just assume the other already knows that they love them and kinda slack on having those special little moments that you used to share together. Especially with careers and children, and just life’s pebbles in the road. Look back on those days that yous so enjoyed. What were those special little moments that used to melt her heart and make you feel like you were standing on top of the world? I don’t think you have to go and do anything huge, alot of women (I know I am the type) just get the greatest feeling from all those little "special" moments in life that yous share together. Hug her, kiss her, tell her everyday that you love her and really put meaning into it. I am not sure where you live, but hopefully here in Ohio the weather seems like it is going to get warmer. This is your time to shine. Take her to the park and walk and talk get caught up on things yous have otherwise "neglected" over the years. Just things like that. Really get the romance back first and move on from there. I wish you all the luck in the world, and you can definently do this. Yeah, lol she will probably be wondering what the heck is going on at first, but don’t just do it once, keep it up and remember that you don’t want to lose that again.
Start treating her like you did 16 years ago. Listen to her. Learn who she is, now. Respect her as she is now. Be the kind of person who she would fall in love with (as she is, now). Remind her why she loved you 16 years ago.
Hopefully you haven’t changed & drifted apart so much that you won’t be able to reconnect to each other, soul to soul.
treat her the same way u did when u were courting her, make her feel she is the most important thing in your life. communicate with her, be there emotionally for her, let her tell u what is wrong with things, and make an effort to change it.
The key word here is "make." You can’t "make" anyone love you. After 4 kids, she’s probably to busy to think of "showing" love outside that of caring for responsibilities. If she "isn’t" then I’d say you need to have a sit down……
You can not make someone love you. Talk to her and ask her if she loves you or if things have changed. Try to do things that will make her happy. Do little things for her. Think about what you did to get her to fall in love with you and marry you. Put a little romance in your marriage. If none of that works then try marriage counseling. Good luck–hope all works out for you.