My boyfriend tells me he’s afraid to love again.?

Okay ,
before we started dating , we talked foreverrrrr. well , now
we’ve been together for 3 weeks and 5 days , & last night my boyfriend tells me he’s afraid to love. The reason for that is because about 2 years ago , his ex broke his heart REALLY bad. It just about killed him , & he says he’s afraid to love & trust again. Well , I LOVE him. I’ve already told him I do. He always says he’s afraid when I tell him that. I don’t know how to take that , or what to , well , do? I tell him I understand that , but I want him to trust & love me. Because I do him ,
so I don’t know how to really take that. What do I do??

Helpp , please?

:)

Please&Thanks ,

  1. Random Man, 06 November, 2009

    i’m thinkin he doesn’t really love you.
    and its not that he can’t trust you its because he doesn’t want to.

    my opinon (cuz mine’s the only one that matters)
    he’s kinda a loser, he won’t love you back because "OOO, my ex-girlfriend broke my sorry lil heart." tell him to be a REAL MAN and work through the pain of the past and be with the girl that loves him right now.

    otherwise just walk away and find you a new BF.

  2. Alex, 06 November, 2009

    Tell him he’s being a wuss.

  3. Emily, 06 November, 2009

    build his trust up again

  4. Reeces, 06 November, 2009

    you should support him… let him be and act the same way and soon he will get use to love again <3 hope that helped

  5. Bored, 06 November, 2009

    I think he really is afraid, he doesn’t want to get hurt. You’ll have to gain his full trust most likely to get him into dating again.
    Just be his best best friend and allow him to put all his trust into you. Then maybe you’ll have a shot :)

    Hope this helps.

  6. Steve, 06 November, 2009

    He sounds like a faggot. I’ll bet he’d tell me he loves me.

  7. livin’itupinCALI, 06 November, 2009

    His not afraid to love his afraid love his afraid to get hurt and left.
    He doesnt want to be put through the same thing again.
    Maybe who should talk to hm about your different.
    He will gain your trudt soon plus you two have only been dating 3 weeks :)

  8. Morgan S, 06 November, 2009

    you need to SLOW down.. trust me 3weeks seems like a while.. but its not.. mabe your rushing.. you DONT want to hurt him..you need to stop and thinkk about do you REALLY love him?
    you need to spend more time learning about him.. maybe there was a reason his ex broke up with him. the last thing you want to do is commit to a relationship then realize you need to end it……
    it would hurt hiim again you DONT want that.

    hope i helped

  9. Oleksandr, 06 November, 2009

    I don’t know, it is his choice

  10. stephanie c, 06 November, 2009

    here is a sure shot for love. tell him that if that is the way he feels then you can just be friends. then tell him that you are going to be away for a few days. if he wants to be with you he will call. if he doesn’t call then don’t waste your time…

  11. purpleluver419, 06 November, 2009

    Ok i know how to deal with this all you have to do is spend a lot of time with him until he feels comfortable around you and knows for sure that he can love you, would you feel the same way if you were in his position. Just give him some time to get use to the fact of dating again and if he feels he’s right for you then he’s be in your arms in no time, just be patient and wait.
    Hope this helps/

  12. Miranda, 06 November, 2009

    Give him time. There’s not many people out there that you can honestly trust. So it’s hard to allow yourself to do that. But i believe if you give it time then he’ll be ready to overcome that fear.

  13. Leo, 06 November, 2009

    it takes time for a man to gain trust in someone ecspecailly if the past has been rough in relationships.and im sure it is the same way for woman. so i say you just stay with him and give him time. also give him a reason to trust you and love you. and to do that just be trustful and loveable which im sure you since your posting this question!

  14. Peter, 06 November, 2009

    I suppose the best you can do is to continue to love him and care about him. At this point it will take time, but his trust for you and others will grow. Just keep on loving and trusting him, time heals most anything.

    Good luck

  15. eldots53, 06 November, 2009

    Oh, puh-leeze! You can’t do anything except dump him, I’m afraid. He’s going to do the "wounded buffalo" routine, and whine about how he is so hurt, and can’t love any more.

    Tell him that you are sorry he is going to join a monastery and miss out on life, but that life is a contact sport, and to participate he will necessarily risk being hurt. Tell him that you intend to live life, and if you get hurt, oh well, but you are not going to hang around cowering in a corner, and you are sorry, but it was nice knowing him.

    If he wants to get help, he WILL. There are people called counselors, and he can get therapy and deal with his situation instead of hiding under the bed, emotionally speaking. He will string you along for years, getting closer and then running away from you. Don’t wait around and put up w this.

  16. I will always love you, 06 November, 2009

    He needs to learn to trust you. Don’t push him, his heart was broken.

    This may be taking a leap, but that’s what love is…
    You need to love him anyways, don’t resent him because he scared. He’s very sensitive about it. He wouldn’t want to love you if you pushed him. Just be there for him, and tell him you really see that he cared for that girl, that he really had those feelings for her, you respect him for that.

    Think about it, wouldn’t you want someone to care for you? Care for him.

    I hope this helps, and I wish you luck :)

  17. friskymisty01, 06 November, 2009

    You have to be alot more patient* Being together for 3 weeks and 5 days is wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy to soon to start saying I LOVE YOU……you don’t even know him well enough to say that really…………You may love being with him, love alot of things about him………
    but……

    Obviously he’s been through a very traumatic ordeal that has scarred his heart and he’s unsure if he’ll be able to cross over , to be able to fully Trust someone with his heart again. You telling him is scaring him….at least he’s opening up with you to let you know that* He isn’t ready to let his heart be in your hands.

    Communication Trust and Honesty are 3 keys to a long healthy relationship, without those you have nothing* .WHen he’s ready to trust fully with his heart* he will let you know* Goodluck*

  18. Hiya, 06 November, 2009

    i know exacally how he feels.
    he loved that girl more than anything and she left him,
    he loves you but he is scared that you’ll leave him, like what she did.
    he is afriad t love someone because he is afriad to loose them.
    the only way to make him believe in you is prove to his heart that you’ll never leave, not in 5 years, not in 10 years, NEVER leave, hard, huh?
    you have to love him forever, your pretty much marrying the guy.
    i know exacally how he feels, everyone i loved most left me, this guy did.
    he wants t love only one person forever, so you must be ready not to ever walk away from him

  19. Makenna, 09 May, 2010

    My husband and i went through the exact same thing, only it was me that broke his heart twice, the second time i really had to build up his trust and now we’re married. Give him time, dont suffocate him, be tjere when he needs you, tell him he can confide and trust you. What ever you do, dont give up. Most guys would think you lied to them about everything if you just gave up. I really hope this helps and i hope you two end up happy. :)

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