Why is getting over a breakup so hard?
December 18th, 2009 by admin | Filed in Getting Over An Ex
My ex of 3 years broke up with me 6 weeks ago. I’m still devastated..I didn’t see it coming. I thought we were both happy in the relationship. I still love my ex very much. I can’t seem to get over the breakup. Please someone tell me I won’t always feel this way. I’m so sad and feel rotten…
How long does it take to get over a breakup?
Tags: 3 years, Getting Over A Breakup, love, relationship
Getting over a relationship breakup is hard. It can be one of the most emotionally painful things you may ever experience in life. Psychologists say that going through a breakup is very similar to going through the process of grieving the death of a loved one. Many of the psychological processes are the same. In both cases you have lost someone you have loved. You most likely are experiencing emotions of sadness, anger, betrayal, rejection, abandonment, and maybe even relief. You probably can barely sleep or eat. You may feel sick to your stomach when the wave of emotions consume you. These things are normal…most people who suffer a breakup from someone they love experience these emotions and feelings.
The key to getting over a relationship breakup is time. You will need time to fully heal yourself. It may take months or in some cases over a year to fully recover.
Here are three ways to speed up the healing process:
1. Determine that you want to get over the relationship breakup. You will not get over them until you convince yourself you want to…You need to decide that it’s over and you want to heal and move on. Keep telling yourself that you want to get over the person you are breaking up with.. It’s crucial that you convince yourself you want to get over the person that broke up with you.
2. Keep busy. You need to keep busy to keep your mind off the person you’ve just broken up with. This is the time to embrace dramatic change in your life. Do the things you’ve always wanted to. Meet new people. Join new groups.
3.It may be helpful if you have a support group to help you heal. Support groups are great because they help you express how you are feeling rather than keeping all your emotions pent up inside. Many people feel alone after a breakup. Knowing that there are other experiencing the same pain as they are can be helpful.
I know it may not seem like it know but you will survive your relationship breakup. You will have good days and bad day during your recovery but you have the ability to become happy again, meet someone new. You just need to decide.
You have a bright future …just hang in there.
I’m rooting for you…
relationship breakup support
It took me a year.
It all depends on what your ready to let go of.
I let go of my ex, but not what he meant to me, and that was the hard party.
You might always remember the feeling and his picture may always make you smile but people are right you wont always feel THIS way, it will get better…in time.
Its been over 2 years and im still hooked. Its horrible
He doesnt really help either
sweety,
it takes a couple seconds to say hello,but forever to say goodbye.
you may never get over him, sorry but its true he obviously didnt feel as confident about the relation ship as you, you just need a girls night, a night for you and your friends, dont keep crying and dont show weakness, you will be okay. find someone else, would you rather be in an awful relationship or a healthy one?
hi! i can totally relate to you on this one.. i broke up with my ex of 7 yrs… 20 days ago! and i still feel dead inside! he recently started talking to another girl… and i never saw it coming.. or expected it. Its not fair.. i know what you are feeling… and seriously its not fair… its such an ugly betrayel feeling that hurts deeply. but guess what? i KNOW i did not do anything wrong.. all i did was love and trust.. and so did you… and KNOW that he lost a good thing… not you. It really sucks because it feels like it was your fault. and it hurts because YOU DID NOT WANT THIS… trust me im going tru the same thing… and i feel like i want to go back with him.. 7 years thrown away…. i want to.. but i would be an idiot if i do.. you just have to accept it!! i mean.. you cant do anything about it… it was his decision. You miss them because you are used to them. and now you feel like you have nothing. but remember you DID NOTHING wrong. it makes me smile to know that i was faithful and a great gf. so smile.. and know that this is destiny… and until you start going out and keeping yourself occupied… you will move on… im there with you. its a start..
because im sure you are blaming yourself… but dont you get it.. that he was the dam slob.
oh yea.. marriages end up in divorce after 20 yrs.. how sad is that?
its part of love..
you cant know love unless you know heartache.
this is the best thing that can happen to you… u dont need someone that you love more than what they ever loved you… imagine how long they were thinking about doing that without you knowing? screw them!! =)
I would say in general, 6 months to a year. I know it sucks. Can’t eat, cant sleep, and think about them ALL the time. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. I have been thru 2 really bad break ups, that I took very hard, almost like a death!!! All that will help. is time.You are still early in this. The best thing to do, is stay away from the other person, as hard as it is, and as much as you want to talk to them, stay away. What sucks, is when you are starting to do much better, and get on with your own life and then the other person calls or contacts you in another way….. you hit rock bottom again and it starts all over. Hang in there and Good Luck.
My friend always says that it takes "upto half of the time that you were together to get completely over a person." But I personally think that it varies from person to person.
However, six weeks is a small time to get over a three year relationship. Give yourself a coupla more months for the wound to heal and the pain to reduce. It is then that you’ll realize that you actually can let go and still be happy. In the mean time, please don’t sit around sulking.. instead spend time with your friends and family, indulge in your hobbies, meet new people – all this will bring some cheer into your life. It will also help you to count your blessings.
Am sure that slowly but surely you will feel better