Can I fall in love with him again?+?
I have been dating this guy for 6 years now. We have a 2 year old daughter together. I decided that I wanted to leave the relationship when I was about 7 months pregnant because I was really unhappy. At that time he was finishing grad school 2 hours away from the home that we shared, so even though we "weren’t together" I continued to live in the home that we had together. When he finished school. I was in my Junior year of Undergrad and decided that it was not financially possible to leave while finishing school with my little girl. So in order to stay on track with school we now lived in the same house but in separate rooms. We called ourselves dating other people and like most girls while he was actually out dating other women I simply lied about seeing other men for about a year so I didn’t seem like I could’ t move on. I was so hurt that the mother of his child could be less than 20 feet away from him and he could actually carry on a romantic conversation in the next room. He had been completely unthoughtful of my feeling and what he had at home. So one day I started to see this really great guy. He treated me like a princess and understood my position on things in my life. He never pushed me to do anything that I wasn’t ready to do including meet my daughter! This guy took a job 5 hours away because I wasn’t ready to fully commit to him though. After my little girls dad realized that I had really moved on and might really like someone, he decided that I was the one that he wanted in his life. I can most definitely see his efforts in trying to turn things around. He still doesn’t cater to the romance that I need from him, but he does make an extra effort to give me all the simple things that I used to ask of him. We have been trying to make it work for about 3 months now and I am really having a hard time trusting him. I am constantly having to tell myself that it is okay to let my guard down but the simple thought of going through what I have been through with him again makes me want to cry. A simple hug from him almost makes me cringe. I am so emotionally disconnected from him. However a small part of me says if he is sincerely trying I should give him the benefit of the doubt. Could I ever fall in love with him again?
Tags: 6 years, 7 months, dad, Fall In Love, Finished School, finishing school, girls, grad school, hard time, job, little girl, little girls, Live 105, princess, relationship, romance, separate rooms, simple thought, undergrad
idk i hate to give relationship advice but it seems like your still pretty hurt about all the little things he didn’t care enough about to do before. and that could really eat at you. Itis the little things that count. I don’t know it just doesn’t seem like you may not be happy with him even if you did fall back in love. it might just be too late. he should have took you when he had the chance and it didn’t seem like he had much trouble getting over you.
Reminder all i know is what you wrote in this paragraph so if your heart tells you different follow your heart. is it possible he only wanted you back because the other girl dumped him. or did he dump her.
i think u should summerize ur story get 2 the point i stopped reading less than half way through…no wonder u have no answers.
Stay strong princess stay strong.
I know this sounds cliche, but what does your heart tell you? If you feel that you will be miserable for the rest of your life with this guy, then I think you know what to do. But perhaps this guy wants the best for his daughter and wants to settle down with a family. What do you want out of your life? What is best for your daughter as well? If that other guy who has moved 5 hours away is willing to start a family with you and your daughter, and you know you’ll live happily together, then why not? Love is so important in a family as well as trust. When it’s not there, relationships typically fall apart. Perhaps it’s too late for the father of your daughter to win your heart back, because you cringe when he tries to touch you. If you do move on, it doesn’t mean he can’t be a part of your child’s life. But ultimately, this is up to you. Hope it works out!
It sounds as if the entire relationship was not your typical one–too many problems and not enough quality time together. Kids are involved–so this is about the cjhildren FIRST—You have to provide stability for them–no matter what. It is an unconventional arrangement and an extremely POOR example of how people should relate and communicate–it is a POOR example of a living arrangement—too many excuses are given for totally bizarre behavior on the part of BOTH OF YOU. If you were to see this relationship in a book–would YOU think it is OK?? You may or may not regain true love–you may or may NOT get this man back in your life—you certainly may give some thought to the harsh reality of making rash decisions and then walking out instead of fixing the problems. Both of you have emotionally needy attitudes—you both made rotten decisions without looking at the future. The children are number one–you two better decide what you are going to do–and if you are NOT getting back together–then separate completely–living together and leading separate lives is NOT trendy–its completely bizarre….and unacceptable. You cannot make this man love you–he may never offer the romance–he may never live up to your expectations—maybe you better rethink that stuff.
Ok…let me put it this way, he started (re)liking you when he learned that you were dating someone. It’s really difficult to trust such person who wasn’t helping you, when you were going through emotional turmoil. It’s just his ego that is not accepting the fact that you have moved on. If you decide to go back to him, i am sure in few days, he will show you his true colors.
I read your story and immediately realized that you were looking for someone to tell you that everything is going to work out fine, but this is life and it hurts more than it feels good… but a second of happiness will make you forget about a year of pain.
People take people for granted, your child’s father is an obvious example. The man who made you happy deserves happiness in return. Laughter is the key to life follow the laughs