I’m in desperate need of sound advice. I never thought I’d be in this situation. My wife and I went on a overseas trip. One late afternoon, we went out for drinks. As we were heading back to the hotel, she fell and hurt herself badly. We then got into a heated argument which continued when we got back to our room. It eventually lead to me storming out in anger, leaving my wife in her injured state. I found myself wondering around town and wound up in a strip club. At the strip club, I spent time in the vip lounge where I kissed and caressed two females there. Afterwards, I returned to the hotel room where I found that my wife had just returned from the police station and reported me missing. I felt extremely guilty and the realization that I could lose my marriage/family over my stupidity hit me like a ton of bricks. I didn’t tell my wife about it out of fear, but she eventually found out by questioning me and I came clean. In retrospect, I should have told her upfront but I so afraid of losing my marriage/family.

Since that terrible afternoon/night, I go through each day (and probably the rest of my life) with great regret, depression, and disgust knowing I screwed up such a beautiful marriage and family. My wife, rightfully so, is angy and upset about the situation and thinks about it day in and day out, particularly she thinks of divorcing me. I desperately need ideas/suggestions on how I can repair this marriage. What things I can do to mend the damage I have caused? I sincerely appreciate any sound advice provided. Thanks.

Tags: anger, desperate need, disgust, Drinks, females, Help Marriage, hotel room, late afternoon, Lead, M 105, marriage, marriage and family, marriage family, overseas trip, police station, realization, rest of my life, retrospect, sound advice, strip club, stupidity, ton of bricks, two females, upfront, vip lounge

ok so we broke up in march but pretty much february considering she cheated on me, but anyways we were together for about 8 months or so, and now juss to tell u, she was my first love, first person to have sex with, first with alotta things…now to my knowledge we broke up to go out and be free and not be tied down cuz were still young, I’m 19 and she’s 18…but wen I found out she cheated on me, she lied to me on y she wanted to break up..she pretty much broke up with me to make her and tha dude she cheated me on with public and official…and then after we broke up, I have no idea y but she deletes me off myspace..and I was like okay but my friend has her on myspace and he showed me her page and it says that her and her new bf(tha dude she cheated me on with) were together since february….funny thing is, is that I met this kid before..them two r friends..well more then friends now..but i even asked her many times after we broke up that if there was anything goin on between him and her and she kept saying no…and she lied to my face on that cuz she didn’t know I saw her page…soo lonnnng story short, the whole relationship was a lie, she cheated on me, and lied about cheating on me…idk how much more this girl can tear my heart apart but she’s doing hell of a good job!!!…now anyways I’m still hurt by all this of course, but I do what everyone says to do, cut off all contact, I don’t text, call nothing wit her!!!! and I have been for the longest time but the problem is that we work together so I see her whenever she works..and that’s the only time!!! now idk I’m doing somewhat good with this broken heart,but I have my moments where I get all emotional and shit and there r times where I’m perfectly fine…now I juss have alotta anger towards her cuz of all this..and I know it’s normal for this but I don’t think I fully let it out, like in a constructive way, cuz I juss don’t talk about our break up really to anyone cuz I thought not talking about it might help but idk, I have my sad moments….I’m not an angry person or nothing but I juss don’t think I let it out all the way..anyone have some ideas of what I can do…OMG NOW IF U READ THIS, THANK YOU SOOOO MUCH!! I’m sorry I wrote soo much

Tags: anger, broken heart, ex girlfriend, first love, first person, funny thing, good job, heart, hell, Knowledge, longest time, love, myspace, relationship, t text, wit

Well, my ex broke up with me a few days ago. Weve been together for over a year, and were living together. Now I want her back. That’s my goal. Why we broke up: Sometimes I take out my anger on her and it’s unfair to her.. I don’t need advice on this I am changing it now, with therapy.( Please note I am not a sick monster or an abuser I just hide myself away when I’m mad or be bitchy towards her). Now, I’ve told her I’m moving out, and she keeps insisting for me to stay and be her friend and live with her until rent is up on May 1st and she has to find a new place. She called me last night to come over to cuddle and watch a movie. Are these games? I’m afraid she wants me as a friend to heal. I’m planning on moving back to my parents today. Should I? Or should I stay and spend the next 16 days to show her I will change and hope she will take me back. I need a gameplan. I want her back. She tells me it is clear she is not my girlfriend anymore, and shes sick of giving me second chances to treat her better. I know this is the biggest shock of my life, and I know I am changing, as I have started taking the steps towards it. I read online to get your gf back you must spend time apart and let her miss you, is this true? Because right now I feel if I stay I will only help her heal, and it will give me false hope which will further mess me up. When I slept with her the past 2 nights she was okay with cuddling, but last night I couldnt handle this mindfuck so I slept on the floor. I want her back. Teach me. Willing to do anything.

Tags: anger, Cuddling, ex girlfriend, false hope, few days, gameplan, games, gf, girlfriend, mindfuck, monster, parents, second chances, shock, these games

I don’t know why… but my husband is very suspicious around me. He says he isn’t, but he definitely is. He never calls his mom in front of me, and when she does call he won’t answer in front of me. He always says " oh we’re busy, I’ll call her tomorrow". He gets constant calls (about 8 a day or more) from 800 numbers…. and this one 414 number. We do have a few debts so when he says they are bill collectors, they very well could be. He does EMS and sometimes he comes home late for work. I used to work at the same company and I know that at times I’d be 3 hours late coming home. Usually when he takes a shower, he brings his cell in there with him(I do the same so I don’t miss important calls). He also brings his laptop but he uses it to play music. I never go on his laptop or through his phone. I have went through his phone before and it always starts fights so I stopped doing it. A lot of times there were hurtful things on there. Him flirting with his co-worker, his mom texting him about divorce papers being in(We’ve since healed our marriage and shredded them months ago). He moved 1 hr 10 mins away from his mom. He moved 1 hour 45 mins from his job. He didn’t want to give up his job or friends or even college for new ones. He killed the car in mileage for 2 years, then finally got laid off from his one job. I got him hired down here, so he finally quit the other one. He tries to say he "quit" that job for me… but i’m sorry. when you move, you accept the fact that you need to find new friends, new jobs, and what have you. He always puts it on me though. He still isn’t very accepting of going to school down here or making friends. He throws a fit anytime i bring it up. Our pastor, aka our marriage counselor, said for him to permanently "delete" that girl the he flirts with from his life. He still hasn’t. Anytime i mention her he bursts out into anger. She got married and texted him right after. He said he doesn’t want to get rid of her because thats His "best friend". I thought i was his best friend? "Oh you know what i mean hun" is his excuse. When his phone rings, I don’t answer it. I’m scared he will get mad at me for answering it. I mean, I am his wife after all, but I want to respect his privacy. I do believe in whats yours is mine though. Other than these things, there really hasn’t been that many issues. We are definitely in love more than ever… but he just lies all the time, even about stupid things that don’t matter. I was cheated on in a previous relationship and always told myself I’d never marry a cheater. Well after we got married he told me he lied about it and used to cheat all the time, but he grew out of it. Why do I always think he is cheating? Why do I never feel like I have enough of his heart? Could it be because of his lies and deceit? Could it be because I’m scared to get cheated on again? I know his family hates me… and that already makes him love me less. I can never go to any family functions…. and he never says anything about it. He doesn’t always make me feel like a queen. He barely listens to me. He never listens to my advice. He only wants to do what he wants to do and doesnt care about my desires, plans or dreams. Its like he still thinks he is single. I really dont know what to do. Maybe if i get him to have the mindset of a husband instead of a single man, things would be better. Who knows how id do that though. I could sit and write here all day. But the point is… I dont feel treasured. I feel taken for granted way too often. It’s almost like that book/movie. "he’s just not that into you"….. only this one married me, then realized it. It sucks and hurts but i love my man and dont even believe in divorce if i wanted to. How do I get him to be more honest? really, i think if he wasn’t so suspicious, I wouldn’t always assume the worst. I know they say if someone thinks someone is cheating, its usually because the other person is and they are self conscious about it. Honestly, I am not cheating. I’m very faithful. I just wish he even cared enough about me to put a real ring on my finger. He’d rather waste money on video games. I’m a very gorgeous thick mid 20 year old woman. I have gained about 10 pounds recently… but this has been ongoing for quite some time idk. What do you think? advice? suggestions? tips to get him to love me more?

Thanks everyone,
goodnight!
I just wanted to re-iterate that to my knowledge has had NEVER cheated on me before… but he said he was a manwhore to his ex’s in the past.

I’ve talked to him and our pastor about all of these issues. The pastor put everything on me. I don’t know why. Anyway, my husband definitely has self esteem issues. I always tell him confidence is sexy, etc, etc. and always try to lift him up and make him see what I see.

I know he’s not cheating now. But I dont know if he did before or not. We just moved. But for some reason, anytime he brings up a female partner, and talks about her all the time…. I just don’t like it. It makes me un-easy. I do have self love and whatever else, I’m just too optimistic that it sometimes blinds me and causes me to be naive.

Thank you all for your advice. I just wish he’d tell the world about me on his websites(even though our status is "married" on them) & buy me a real wedding ring. Our marriage is only as strong as our ring! <3 Fake rings = flimsyness

Tags: 10 mins, 800 numbers, anger, bill collectors, co worker, coming home, debts, divorce papers, ems, Husband Cheating, job, Laptop, marriage, marriage counselor, mileage, mom, music, new friends, new jobs, Play Music

I’ve been dealing with a breakup from a girl I’ve been with for the past three years. We met at the end of senior year in high school. I went to school 10 hours away freshman year and we stuck through it. I felt stronger and stronger about her each day. I decided to come back home and go to school with her for sophomore year. Again, it was a fantastic year and I loved every minute I spent with her. We were best friends, inseparable and we connected on a very deep level. I knew I loved this girl but I felt like I needed to go back to my first school to get a significantly better degree. At the end of sophomore year I told her I wanted to go back. She began to pull away until I told her I was doing it for us and to better my future. That made her feel better but she still pulled back. I kind of changed too as a result. I felt weird about her actions and I knew she took my leaving as a slap in the face. I began to be more short with her and our relationship took a turn for the worst. I thought everything was fine until one day a couple weeks before I left that she came in my bedroom as I woke up and said she wanted to be single the next year. She said the way I had been acting, the distance, and everything made her want this. I went through many stages of falling apart, anger, upset, numb, happy, just every emotion. A few weeks ago I got to school and my feelings stabilized. I realized that this is a girl worth fighting for. I took a look at myself and the way I had acted to push her away. I think God forced me to make the decision to leave to better myself and now I feel like I can be the most amazing boyfriend to her. I’m now going back home because I don’t feel this is the place for me right now. This decision was not because of her, but it doesn’t hurt that the love of my life is there. She’s been kind of seeing somebody now. She says she likes him but still loves me. She asks me why I’d deserve a second chance after hurting her. She says maybe in a few years we can try again. I know I’ve changed and I know that our relationship is right. I know I can be everything this girl could ever want. I know her better than anyone in the world. We are still best friends. I’m afraid she’s already written me off because she is unsure and doesn’t want to be hurt again, even though she hasn’t told me this. I’m going back in a few days and I’ve gotten her to go to dinner with me this upcoming weekend. She says its strictly as friends. I want to show her I can be a great boyfriend but how can I do this as just a friend? How can I show her I’ve changed and will always make her happy? What about this other guy, I’ve been supportive but how do I approach it? If you’ve read this far then I really appreciate it and I look forward to hearing back. Thanks.
No need to be a dick Linah. Thanks to everyone else who’s taking me seriously
@ LM: correction, shes not with another guy just seeing him. she says she doesn’t want to be his girlfriend even though hes asked…makes me think even more shes confused as to what to do

Tags: anger, best friends, couple weeks, Dealing With A Breakup, emotion, Fall In Love, feelings, freshman year, girl worth, god, Love Of My Life, relationship, second chance, senior year, slap in the face, sophomore year