I dated my best friend for about 3 years. When my life was spiraling out of control he came out of nowhere and helped me. I never saw him that way until we got super close and then one day we went from best friends to dating. But we stayed friends and well we just clicked and got along. He was good for me. But not for long. We had a rocky on and off relationship and it really messed us both up. Made him more colder and angrier and made me more sad and distant. We began to fight more and soon we would spend weeks apart, pissed at one another. But I never stopped loving him. I loved him so much. Too much I thought at one point. And we kept trying to save the relationship by going back out and giving in one last try, saying this would be it and we’d make it. But…we never did. And he made so many promises to me. I’m 17 and still in high school so I have to see him all the time and it tears me up. About the third year he got more distant even while we were dating. He stopped calling completely, only texted me when he was bored, was always busy and never really talked to me much but since we had so much history and cause I loved him so much I brushed it aside and stayed. But it got worse. Really worse really fast. We broke up because he was treating me badly so I dumped him and yet we did things together which though it’s my fault only made me love him more oddly enough. But then I found out he was only using me. For about the last year we were together he was using me. It meant nothing to him really. And then it all happened in a sort of domino effect. One right after another he betrayed me with something that felt like a slap to the face. And before he did all that to me he just stopped even talking to me. He ignored me, barely looked at me and would avoid me and I was so confused! I thought we were still friends, still trying to work it out, but apparently he was already ready to move on, forget me. But he never told me until I asked him and he just said he was over me. And that was it. I was shocked but surprisingly okay. I guess I was just too tired to care anymore. But still. We went out seperate ways and I wished him well and told him I’d always miss him. But then the betrayals came and he broke my heart. I couldn’t believe it, wrap my head around how he could do that to ME. The person that was always there for him, always loved him, always honest and loyal to him and he betrayed me. I confronted him twice about two things that he did to me and I just lost it! I freaked out on him. And he said he never meant for it to happen and that he would leave me alone. We parted again. And for weeks I was getting better, okay without him, and he ignored me like always only this time it didn’t hurt as much. But then I started thinking about him more and started missing him like crazy. I just couldn’t erase 3 years of history. Couldn’t let it be over. So with advice from my best friend I pulled him aside to ask him if he was okay. He wasn’t. He was very sad. So like a stupid girl I assumed it was because he missed me. But then soon enough a week after that we started talking again, like magic. And we began to act like we used to, like good friends, teasing and joking and he even seemed to go back to his old self and treat me well. We even started flirting. And I knew in the back of my mind I couldn’t be with him after all he’d done with me. But I couldn’t stop falling for him. Again. Or at least…liking him. I began to feel things again and then…I began to realize one night that I shouldn’t care about him, after all he’d done to me. That it was time to let him go. So I did. I began to ignore him, pass him by in the hall. And it sucked. But I felt better day by day, and I thought I was okay, I was finally getting better again. But then just last night my friend called me and told me that he was dating someone else and it killed me! I don’t know why or what to do! I know I don’t love him but three years is so much time to just forget and erase to me. He was the first person I ever loved, or let in, we did everything together and we close mentally and physically, so this has really left me messed up. I’m humiliated and broken hearted because I hung on to every promise he made me only to find out he found someone else and I never meant that much to him. It cuts me up. And I just want this pain to go away so I can finally move on with me life. But even though I’m strong and I have great friends I feel so alone and betrayed and hurt and he’s the only one I want. I don’t know why he did this to me. Why he thinks it’s okay. Why he just stopped even talking to me, like we never meant anything. And I know it’s life and time heals all wounds but honestly I’m scared it won’t. Three years makes an impact especially when you never felt that way before. He came into my life at the best time and really saved me. So now my heart feels a

Tags: 3 years, best friend, best friends, domino effect, relationship, slap

Well, this all started before christmas. My ex GF, cait, broke up with me, and i was a wreck. I was so unbelievably in love with her, and i got the "lets be friends" talk.

Well, 3 weeks later, I started going out with this other girl, jessica, thinking she would make me forget about my ex. i was wrong, and we ended up having a mutual breakup. So my best friend, mike, liked jessica a LOT, and was very pissed off when he found out we were dating. problem is, he had told me he liked other girls too, and that jessica was the only one. So i assumed i was essentially in the clear. When i found out i wasnt, i felt terrible, apologized profusely, and ultimately ended up breaking it off for his sake, and also because i was stil thinking about cait.

the day after jessica and I started going out, i was talking to mike about it, and he asked me "how would you feel if i went out with cait before or after you guys dated?" i answered honestly, "terrible". Well sure enough, a day later i get a text from mike with the words "we’re straight". I knew INSTANTLY that he had done something terrible, or was planning to. ive known mike since we were in diapers, and i knew hed be out for revenge. it was always like that, ever sice we were kids. if you hit him jokingly, he had to hit you back ten times harder.

so i get back from xmas vacation, and mike and cait are all over eachother. this absolutely DESTROYED me inside. I put up with them cuddling and stuff for a couple of weeks, but then finally exploded. He is now my ex best friend, and I hate him more than any other human bieng on the planet. He only got after cait to get revenge on me, and since hes not exactly a hit with the ladies (he is an ugly mofo…), once he realized he’d pulled it off, that he’d made cait like him, he ran with it, because he knew thats all he could get. He ran with it even tho he KNEW it was killing me inside. this is why i hate him.

Meanwhile, over the last month, i thought about WHY cait gave me the "better as freinds" talk; I ACTED like a friend. i was shy around her, and acted exactly like i had before when we WERE friends. its been a rough couple of months, and a lot of things have happened. the one thig stayed the same though; I love her still. Ive actually thought about her non stop for almost 2 years, but only recently did we start dating. I feel she is the one. And to anyone who’s ever found that special someone… when you know, you know.

So i want her back… im not sure how im going to do it, but giving up is no longer an option. ive tried, and everytime it just comes right back to her. I know it wont happen soon… but im optimistic about the situation. I think i can turn this around.

I know this wont be easy, maybe not even entirely fesable, but ill wait for however long it takes. I just need to find a way to attract her to me again… all i want is a chance to rectufy my mistakes, a chance to show her i can be everything she ever wanted. I want to be the one she wakes up to, i want to be the one she can lean on when shes having a hard time. i want to be the one who comforts her when shes sad, and the one to ask whos ass im going to have to kick when shes angry. she is everything to me and more; i just want her to know i mean every syllable of the words "i love you", and for her to feel that way too…
you have no idea how good that felt to type.

Tags: best friend, bieng, christmas, Cuddling, diapers, ex gf, friend mike, girls, love, mofo, quot, revenge, sake, sice, tho

My ex boyfriend (we’ll call him Sam) and I were friends from middle school and later dated for about 3 years. We lived together after high school for a while with our best friend. "Sam" was everything to me, everyone knew us as the one couple that might actually make it. Our families were ready for us to marry one day.the only flaw was he wasn’t on the same sexual plane as me.. He didn’t seem comfortable with sex. The lack of intimacy frustrated me and eventually we just became more like friendly room mates than the beautiful relationship we had. Feeling insecure I started flirting with an old hook up buddy that lived in another state. "Sam" found out and we broke up. It’s been almost 2 years and I am 21 years old now. I’ve had 2 boyfriends since, and am with somebody currently. But recently and randomly for the past month for some reason I can’t stop thinking about my ex and I can’t stop crying over him. Help please?
When we would talk about it he didn’t see the problem and eventually stopped kissing me in fear of turning me on. We have talked about it, we still met every couple months for lunch to talk and catch up but his recent girlfriend isn’t comfortable with it. I’m mostly looking for advice on how to FIX the mess I made- I’m aware I messed up…

Tags: 3 years, best friend, Boyfriends, fear, girlfriend, hook up, lack of intimacy, lunch, relationship, room mates

This is going to be a little long, but I appreciate anybody that reads the whole thing because I could really use some advice. So here goes nothing.

There’s this guy. I’ve known this guy for about a year and a half. The moment we met, we clicked and within a month we were talking like we’d known each other for years. We’ve been through a lot, but we always work through it. He’s my best friend, my rock…I honestly don’t know what I’d do without him. And I’d hate to lose him.

A couple of months ago, we both went to a Halloween Scary Movie Marathon and ended up making out and cuddling the whole night (the cuddling was a normal thing that we usually do, but the making out not so much). After it happened, we said it was just us being lonely, but I couldn’t stop thinking about him. This wasn’t something that I was used to feeling. I started to see him in a new light. I had always loved him, but not in any way other than as my best friend. I couldn’t tell him though because I was afraid that we might get too serious and I’ve never been good with committed relationships. Plus, he’s a Senior and I’m a Junior and if he left, I wouldn’t want to deal with it. So I just chalked it up to attraction and proposed a friends with benefits kind of thing.

We made out again in November, and it’s been this ongoing flirtationship since the first time we hooked up. The thing is, our relationship has only gotten stronger. I tell him more and he tells me more. There are things I could never tell anyone that I tell him because I know it doesn’t change how he feels about me.

We have these conversations where we both hint at our feelings for each other, but neither of us really says it. For example, one night, he told me that he has these series of plans to make girls fall in love with him and he asked if I was worth wasting all the plans on. I said I didn’t think so and he said he thought I was with all his heart. But then a couple of days later, I brought it up, and he asked me if I really wanted that or if I just wanted a sexual squeeze ball. I wanted to tell him I wanted it and how I felt, but I didn’t because again, I was afraid. So I said I just wanted sex. But then when I went back on it and said that I didn’t know how I felt about it, he suggested that we take a break from alone time (meaning not hook up for a while).

Well, for the past few weeks or so he’s been talking to a Sophomore. She’s everything I’m not, and everything that he loves. She’s a romantic. She’d rather have one beautiful kiss than an evening of passion. She loves Nicholas Sparks and she loves The Notebook. She has these ideas about true love and she’s a lot like him. She wants a fairytale, movie magic romance. He gets giddy and happy when he talks about her. And all I want is for him to be happy. So I support him because I feel like he can’t be happy with me. Because I don’t want a relationship, and he does. And he knows that I don’t want a relationship.

At our friend’s New Years Eve party last night, we stayed up all night watching movies again, and he and I cuddled like we always do and he kept nuzzling me, and we ended up kissing a couple of times. Not making out – just kissing. I wanted to do more, but I know that he has this girl in his life, and I didn’t want to ruin it for him because I know he can be happy with her. He drove me home in the morning and we had a conversation while sitting in my driveway where I told him that I was sorry I couldn’t be everything he wanted and that I was sorry that I didn’t know how to commit. I mentioned that I know where I’m going in life – which he already knows anyway – and that I felt that getting into a relationship with him would just hold me back. And he agreed. I told him I loved him. And he said he loved me too. But he also said he really liked this girl. And I felt wrong and bad telling him I was jealous, which I did, but I didn’t tell him that I didn’t want him to be with her. And I feel like I should have. But instead I just told him that all I needed was to get my love for him out of my system and that everything would be fine. Then I kissed him on the cheek and got out of his truck and went inside.

I feel just horrible. We’ve been texting all day like normal, but I just don’t know what to do about my feelings. Can anybody help? Again, I’m sorry this is so long. I am eternally grateful to anyone that will answer this for me.

Tags: best friend, committed relationships, conversations, couple of days, Cuddling, feelings, friends with benefits, girls, halloween, heart, Lonely, Lot, love, marathon, relationship, scary movie

I dated a girl for 11 years. We never married because she didn’t believe in marriage. I truly loved her completely and never doubted her love for me. I did everything for her, above and beyond most men. When I moved to take a job in a city she wanted to be in, she decided not to follow me and left me.

Shortly after our split, which was cordial although painful, she started dating and sleeping with my best friend. I am twice the man he ever will be and it just destroys my pride she would do this. Then she begged for me back and I took her back. Then she left me again and started dating my friend again.

It’s been over a year and I still can’t help but I still feel hurt and angry. And, I still have love for her. I can’t seem to move on to love any other woman, despite dating around. Should I continue dating? Will I ever get over her? Will I ever love again?

Tags: 11 years, best friend, Dating, job, Job Wanted, love, Love Girl, Love Woman, marriage, Other Woman, pride