My wife and I have just celebrated our 14th wedding anniversary on Nov-18th. we have been married since she was 18 and I was 22. We are now 34 and 38. We have 2 boys ages 7 and 12. She is a Nurse Anesthetist and is currently doing her residency. I guess it was right around our anniversary that i noticed something just wasn’t right. I asked her about it and she assured me it was nothing could explain and she said she would get over it. I decided to just drop it.Then that fateful day came when I had left the house for a little while and came back to find a letter that she was leaving and we needed to separate for a while. I freaked and immediately started calling her and texting to get her back home. I agreed we would go to counseling and after most of the afternoon she finally returned I helped her unpack and we talked, this is where I did what I always did and just blew her off and never really listened to what was happening. She told me that I never help around the house with laundry and dishes and with kids. While she works 65+ hrs a week. I am a local truck driver and work about 45 to 50 hrs a week. We never went to counseling and I said I would change and start helping and never realized I was still being the same old me and nothing had changed. She noticed and we fought again. I finally ended up leaving this time and realized that night I screwed up bad. I called her and said I was sorry, and I was coming home to make things work. She said thank you for trying. I came home the next day which was a last Friday and I washed all of clothes in the laundry room and put them away, I washed the dishes and put them away, their was also clean dishes in the dishwasher that I put away, I cleaned up the kitchen and had the boys squared away before she got home around 6pm. We talked for several hours when she got home and I assured her I changed and I really listened to her and never raised my voice at her not even once. She told me it’s just something she feels and has felt this way for over a year! She said it was something she needs to work on. I assured her this was the "new" me and I am a changed man and I was sorry it took this long for me to realize what I was doing. I think we made love that night then I went shopping with her on Saturday and we made love again that night. we went to church on sunday (something we hadn’t done in many years). We just talked for a while telling each other that we loved one another and made love again. Monday I went to work and she texted me that afternoon saying that she would be late working, I told her no problem that I had to drive to McAllen Tx that night which was 9 hours away and I would ask my mom to come sit with the kids. I went home that afternoon and washed dishes and done laundry and fed the kids and made their lunches and laid their clothes out for the next morning. I then called her and brought her a hamburger up to her work because she was hungary. She was just getting off and so we ate and talked a little. She assured me she loved me and that she was working on her "Issues". I told her everything was done at home and I left to go get in my truck. Drove all night thinking about us and got to where I was going at about 5:30a and unloaded at 7a. Still no sleep worrying about us. I called her on the way back and we calmly talked and this is when she told me she loves me more than anything but she’s not "in love" with me, because of all the time I treated her wrong by walking on her. She said she sees that I have changed and she was very happy that we can talk and she felt better about telling me. She also said she wished I had done this a very long time ago and that she was here and willing to get rid of her feelings and move on, but she needs help from a someone. Tonight we talked again and I assured her that I am forever changed and how much I love her, and I would be the best Dad, Husband and Friend she could ask for. I explained how sorry I was for doing her the way I had done over the years and that she was the best wife anyone could ever ask for. We both broke down crying, and after a little while we finished agreeing we would fix this. A little later we ended up making love again from kissing. This time it was very passionate. I don’t want to loose her and she don’t want us to end either she has an appointment with counselor on Monday and I do on the 22nd of December. I know she has anger about the past she needs to deal with and I am doing my very best still. She just don’t know how. I told her tonight that was done kissing up and I was just going to be the old me just an "updated" version. The guy she fell in love with before. I don’t want to drive her away by trying to hard. I am worried sick. Does anyone out there see her and us getting better? What could I do to help her fall in love with me again? I have a company Christmas Party Saturday night, she is very excited about that and so am I. What could I do to on this night to help re-spar

Tags: 14th wedding anniversary, 6pm, boys ages, clothes, coming home, counseling, dishes, dishwasher, fateful day, last friday, laundry room, leaving this time, love quot, nurse anesthetist

My step children are hideously selfish and don’t listen to a thing I tell them. They won’t even bathe! They’re 14(boy) and 11(girl). My husband has a passive parenting style. He hates to hear any fussing or fighting and likes to avoid confrontations. He knows that they treat me bad, but he says he doesn’t understand why he lets them do it. He says he just doesn’t know how to make them do the right thing. He’s tried punishment, rewards, and a combination of both. Nothing seems to work. I know that he loves me very much and it bothers him that he can’t figure out how to make the children behave and do as they’re told. He also loves his children, but they are tearing our marriage apart. Anyone have any ideas or have you ever been in this same situation??
A little more info:
We have a two year old daughter together. Mu husband just deployed to Iraq and will be gone 15 months. The mother rarely calls, lives out of state and is schizophrenic . She sees them maybe once every other year. My husband is a good man and a good father to my baby. He carries a lot of guilt about his divorce and the impact it had on his kids. I didn’t mean to make it sound like he was spinelss. I think his passiveness stems more from guilt than anything else.
We’ve been married for about 3 1/2 years.
I tried for the first two years to have some sort of relationship with the two of them. I’ve done things with them/for them, I’m the one who takes them shopping, I’m the one who buys them new clothes, I’m the one who makes their father take them to the library, the park, etc. After two years of doing for them and getting nothing (respect) in return, I stopped doing so much for them. They are just REALLY selfish children who were used to being the bosses and getting what they wanted. I’ve even suggested family counselling, but now that my husband is deployed, it’s too late for that.
Just a little nore in defense of myself: My husband is in the military and he’s not home much. The children are left in my care. I have provided them with structure and activities. It’s easy for a few to point the finger at me and say I’m the one being selfish, but if you any idea how many "talks" the kidsa and I have had about our relationship, you’d understand why, at this point, I’m pulling my hair out. I agree with some of the negative comments. You’re right, I shouldn’t let their behavior bother me, but I don’t know of any way to just "turn off" my emotions when they treat me so badly. Even their father ADMITS that they treat me badly. Again, I have suggested (on several occasions) that we seek family councelling. I work, their father is gone, and I’m taking care of all three children. Is it so much to ask, for them to just follow a few rules? I’ve compromised a lot. I stopped nagging them to bathe, brush teeth, do homework or clean up after themselves!
By the way, Skidoo, my screen name was a joke between my sister and myself. One I’ve had for years. No hidden meaning whatsoever.

And for any of you who took offense to the term "demonic step children", come on! It was a phrase to show just how frustrated I am with them! I’ve done more for those two chilldren since I’ve known them than either their real mother or their father. I’ve taught them why they shouldn’t lie or steal, how to have compassion for others, how to take care of themselves, and a lot of other real life skills they need to become productive adults. The issues they have were going on a looooong time before I was ever in the picture. I tried to give them what they needed but they rejected me, so don’t point fingers at me for getting tired of trying to help them when they don’t want or appreciate my help. Sometimes, I think the only ones who really understand are the ones who have walked in my shoes. And some called ME judgemental?

Tags: 15 months, clothes, confrontations, counselling, divorce, do the right thing, good man, guilt, iraq, little nore, marriage, Mu, parenting style, passiveness, relationship, Rewards, selfish children, shopping

I admitted two nights ago to my husband, I slept with someone else twice (see my previous two questions for the back story, not going to retype it again) and screwed up. I prayed he would understand and give our marriage a go but instantly flew into a rage and made me sleep on the couch.

The next morning, he had packed my bags and clothes were all thrown into boxes and he said I best be gone when he gets back. So I had to go my sisters and today I called to talk reason with him and he said hes filing for divorce. I am heartbroken beyond words and wish I could repair my marriage. I was in a low place when I slept with my brother in laws best friend and I know I screwed up. I was just heartbroken over a series of fights me and my husband had and the lack of attention he has given me over the last two months (we married in November 2009). I just hate to think I am now going to 20 (my birthday in Saturday) and a divorcee’.

Anyone got any advice? Like how I can make my husband see that I love him still and want to form a family with him? I have thought about working on my 6 year old stepdaughter but he has refused me from ever seeing her again and I loved that girl like she was my own and now my world has come crumbling down.

If I get divorced, I will lose my whole stable world. My family is far aware and we had carved a life together. I will not get a thing out of this because my adultery will be used against me and he owns his house legally. So can anyone help me save my marriage to my soul mate?
I already feel guilty enough. My husband has made it clear hes heartbroken after providing me with so much and being faithful to me.

And DO NOT tell me I am too young to be married. I love my husband and thats all that matters. My question is not related to my age but a call for advice. If you tell me I am too young to be married, I will downrate and report for not providing an answer.
Daughter, my husband owned that house since he was 18, years before we married. I never had a deed to it and my state still has adultery as a ground for divorce and is still not liberal in divorce. I am up sh*t creek property wise because the house is legally his and his familys (been in it for 110 years).
Daughter, my husband owned that house since he was 18, years before we married. I never had a deed to it and my state still has adultery as a ground for divorce and is still not liberal in divorce. I am up sh*t creek property wise because the house is legally his and his familys (been in it for 110 years).
Daughter, my husband owned that house since he was 18, years before we married. I never had a deed to it and my state still has adultery as a ground for divorce and is still not liberal in divorce. I am up sh*t creek property wise because the house is legally his and his familys (been in it for 110 years).

Tags: 18 years, adultery, best friend, boxes, brother, clothes, couch, divorce, divorcee, filing for divorce, hes, Infertility, lack of attention, last two months, marriage, next morning, rage, sleep, soul mate, stable world, stepdaughter

a year ago i was flirting with this girl just joking around then we actualy started liking each other…we never went out but it was close… she liked me and some other guy at once and she picked him but him and her never got together it just dindt workout between them.. last year she used to start converstations and flirt with me… but now i have to say something to her or she wont say anything to me… but if i start flirting with her she will flirt back but not the same way she did it before…even if im near her she wont say anything it seems like shes completly not interested… like she doesnt notice me… how can i get her to notice me more? im popular and i wear nice clothes/shoes and im funny in that class.. how can i get her to like me again?

Tags: Actualy, clothes, completly, converstations, shoes, workout

okay… well im 14 and my boyfriends older.. 4 years older.. i met him a year ago online.. and ever since we’ve met we have been inseperable all day every day. i went 12,000 minutes over my phone bill and we are always together if not on the phone. im sure you can see there is quiete an age diffrence and most people say im not mature enough for him or hes to old for me, or it will never work. But that’s all just stupid statictics that dont matter. we have everything in common. Are taste in music, movies, clothes, people, religion, fetishes (lmao), life, and relationship decisions are all the same. he even left his girlfriend for me. and my ex boyfriend said we are perfect for each other. he has helped me through the toughest time in my life. he stopped me from commiting suicide.. i like to think i help him to.. lol.. well he tells me i do, and im the most important thing in his life. he is so sweet, and funny, and nice, and he understands me, and loves me unconditionally, and he can be serious when i need him to be. lol he’s like my "edward cullen" or "prince charming" or anyone elses perfect guy/dream guy thats what he is to me =]. we never ever fought and never disagreed. but a few weeks ago he proposed.. and of course i said yes! he is everything i could ever ask for and so much more. he’s not the first person ive been in love with but i definatley want him to be the last. but anyway back to the point. ever since he proposed he’s been really needy and he yells at me alot and its awkward. not to mention went he smokes dro (weed) he gets really violent… i love him to death i just want to make things better between us, it never used to be this way. i want to make him fall in love with me all over again. DO NOT SAY IM TOO YOUNG PLEASE! just answer my question thank u
God Bless!
omfg dont say suck it or blow him or become his sex slave!?! wtf?!?! ive done that.. he seems to enjoy it =]

Tags: Boyfriends, clothes, Decisions, dream guy, Fall In Love, first person, girlfriend, love, Met, music, prince, quot, relationship, religion, sex slave, statictics, suicide, time in my life, u god