We’re both in highschool. We dated for about 8 months, but had a thing for a long time before that, and he’s my first love. My ex-boyfriend broke up with me 1 and a half months ago because he said he didn’t feel the same way about me and just wanted to be single, and also because at that time we were arguing a lot. He started drinking a lot now, and using drugs. He used to act like a complete dick to me after the breakup, saying that I was a waste of his time, and that he never loved me, so I told him that until he changed and started acting nice to me, we couldn’t be friends. So now he is nicer to me. Anyway, long story cut short, he phones me sometimes late at night now for no reason.. They’re reaaally long phonecalls sometimes, like 4 hours if they’re late at night. He always sounds sad, but he just says he’s really tired because it’s like 12/1 am when he phones. He usually talks about girls he’s met and stuff, but not really as much anymore, and always questions if I’ve done shit with guys. He always says he’s confused and doesn’t know what makes him happy anymore, and says that he misses being truly happy with someone he cares about. I asked if he missed me then, and he said ‘I do, but you only made me feel like that sometimes because of the arguing (we only started arguing a month before we broke up). We’ve only had one emotional talk about why we broke up, and it just led to apologies, and us telling eachother how much we care about eachother and such. He used to say he was over me, but now he says things like "I still have feelings for you, I havent moved on", and when he said it I responded with "I still love you", but he always tells me I don’t. He also says things like "Maybe in the future we’ll date again, but not now", or he’ll say "I bet you don’t even think or talk about me.." I don’t know, it just seems weird.. And I’ve become kind of interested in his friend, and he’s noticed I’ve started talking to him a lot, and that we gave eachother nicknames, so when I’m on the phone with my ex he bad mouths his friend, saying that his friend says bad things about me, and all the shit he’s done with girls recently. And he commented on the nicknames, and I said "Ahaha, are you jeaaalous?", and all he responded with was "Don’t even flatter yourself."
Like all of these things comming from his mouth, like all the feelings and stuff started from 2 weeks ago. I know this sounds like he just wants to have his cake, but not be monogomous, but do you think he’s sincere and wants me back? I’m so confused..

Tags: Act, Acting, apologies, dick, drugs, feelings, first love, Frie, Friends, girls, late at night, late night, Led, long time, Night Sounds, phonecalls, quot, Sad, Shit, Weird

Okay so on March 1 I broke up with my best friend named Beth. I broke up with her because she always lied to me and she stole my money. Once she was dating a guy named Jacob who did drugs. I told her that she should break up with him. She told me that she did. A couple days later I found out that she still thought she was in love with Jacob and that she wanted to run away with him to Canada and that she never broke up with him. After that I forgave her and didn’t talk about it anymore until she stole my money. I showed her were my money was because we were going to Starbucks and I needed some money to go. Two weeks after that a hundred dollars of mine were missing. She was the only person who knew where my money was. She said she didn’t take the money which was a lie… so on March 1 I broke our friendship. My heart has been breaking very since. We were friends for four years and best friends for three years. I have thought about suicide but that would heart my family to much. So I don’t know what to do and I really need help… please tell me the best way to heal my broken heart…cause I still love her with all my heart.Thanks for the help!!

P.S. Please don’t call my lesbian because I loved my best friend which just happened to be a girl… I like guys so I am straight. I’m not dissing those who are gay or lesbian I’m just not going to be one.

Tags: best friend, best friends, broken heart, Canada, couple days, Dating, drugs, friendship, jacob, love, march 1, money, starbucks, suicide

to put it short, me and my ex-boyfriend (long distance) were together for over a year but have been broken up for about 2 months now. he kind of changed for the worst (drugs and drinking) lately yet i still love him.. whenever he talks to me nowdays (random, short texts) he usually is just very sarcastic and doesn’t take me seriously, at least not from what i see. im a sophomore in high school and he’ll be starting his first year of college in the fall. the other night we texted eachother until about 3 in the morning and he randomly said that he missed the special moments we’ve had but then changed the subject. from what i can see anyway it appears he’s moved on but i was just wondering if you think there is ANY chance in h*ll of getting back together with him, with what he said the other night? ive done the begging and ive kinda just given up lately.. i might sound really silly but we really did love eachother alot back then and i at least dont want him to just forget about me. help!!
p.s. – towards the end of our relationship, he kind of got new friends which i think is the main reason for his recent drug and drinking marathon – he used to do that stuff before we went out, but he knew i disapproved, so he quit but now he’s started again. and i just have this state of mind that he IS in college now and all he’s interested in now is some one night stands with a bunch of random girls and he is for sure going to wonder what the heck he was doing with someone over 1,000 miles away from him .. yeah

Tags: drugs, eachother, Ex Boyfriend, long distance, love, marathon, new friends, random girls, recent drug, relationship, sophomore, texts, what the heck

I have been with this guy on and off for 7 years. We have a 5 year old together. I love him very much though I have every reason not to. He has lied, cheated in the past, done drugs, been arrested for them, and still hangs out with the people he used to do them with even though he is on probation. We would fight every single day over his poor choices and his continual lying.

He told me 2 weeks ago he doesnt love me anymore and that I ruined his family by telling his parents the bad stuff he was up to. He said he would find another girl he doesnt have such a history of doing bad things to. This hurts so bad… I know I shouldnt be with him but no matter how many times I hear that its near impossible to let go. It sounds selfish but its hard for me to see him with another girl because im afraid they will have some great relationship that I tried to have with him but we couldnt cause of his actions.

Why is my heart not healing from this? He has moved on and hasnt looked back…
Lily – you dont have the most comforting personality, do you?

Tags: bad stuff, broken heart, drugs, great relationship, heart, lily, parents, personality, poor choices, probation, single day

Well, the title is not entirely my question, what I want to know is have I been going crazy my whole life or is my life just crazy. since i could ever remember I always found out answers to everything, whether it was me or friends I always loved finding answers and being right. as I got older I guess experimenting with drugs made me much more creative and relaxed I really like being creative, It makes me feel free. NE Ways, i am 35, feel like im 20, partied quite a bit in my teens and early 20s – now that I have grown up a bit I find myself trying to protect myself and others but it never seems to work all i do is hurt myself, what I mean by this is that through my 20′s I had a relationship and had 2 children, at first I was the responsible adult and worked hard for my family but after 5 years the relationship went sour and we split up, I got custody of my kids because i couldn’t deal with her life and I felt that my kids were never going to have the proper upbringing. so at that point were I lost control of my life, I somewhat fixed the pain by getting custody of my kids. well, since then I have been trying to be the best dad i can be but Instead I have become a dad that’s constantly worrying. I constantly have these real like moments of imagination, daydreaming but it feels real, but instead of daydreaming nice things it’s always things that can go wrong terribly wrong. I get anxiety , it brings on my OCD of checking if the doors are locked, are the seat belts working, is that car gonna swerve, etc but before i check the lock each and every time I see one of my kids falling out of the car, vividly. It feels terrible, I can be at work and all of a sudden I have a thought of one of my kids getting hit by a car while walking home. anxiety with every thought comes and goes all day, and I have started to ignore the thoughts but they still get in my head somehow. I have since married to a wonderful girl and had 2 more children and now I have 5 people to be constantly worried about. I know that most of this doesn’t make sense but I AM GOING SOMEWHERE WITH THIS.

During the first year of my new relationship with my current wife we became pregnant and we also discovered that we both had HPV,
A hole new set of issues came to play about a month after this discovery, and it is a large reason for this rant, I have become more and more uneasy on the subject of having sex. I don’t crave it like I used to, it makes me nauseous to think about it, there are times that I don’t care and it’s great but they don’t come around very often.

I ultimately & intimately feel unworthy of making love. It does not bother my wife but it just urks me out. this issue combined with the first issue, ocd and anxiety, not to mention all the stress this brings on, I feel crazy. I have found that vicodin helps me with my over thinking and stress but does not help in bed. plus I really dint want to self medicate the issue that way.

my simple question to everything is, I am afraid of losing my job if I go see professional help. I want to feel better but I don’t want to lose everything I have built. – what are some suggestions out there from some sane ppl. there’s so much more to my complicated life. these are just the highlights. if anyone wants to edit this and make sense of it be my guest.

Tags: drugs, Friends, Guess, I 98, relationship, Responsible Adult, Whole Life