I just found out that I’m pregnant and my boyfriend wants me to get the abortion pill and terminate the pregnancy. His reasoning is good, he knows we’re not ready, I’m not finished with college and he is about to go back to school next semester. He also doesn’t want to damage our relationship, he says that’s what happened with his ex wife, their relationship was torn apart because of the baby and she ultimately cheated on him. I know that I’m different though and we’re different, i know we can make it work if we try and stay honest with each other about how we’re feeling.

As you may have figured out, he already has a 7 month old son with his ex wife and is currently in and out of court trying to get full custody. He is a very good father and very responsible. He has a steady job and makes more money than most people several years older than himself. I know we could do it.

I’m not sure I could live with myself after getting an abortion. I’m 5 weeks along, did you know the baby already has a heartbeat at 5 weeks!? I’m generally pro choice but I’m not sure I could personally make that decision. I’m worried about medical complications, which I know are rare with the pill, but knowing my luck with medical procedures…

I’m also concerned with the emotional effects. He doesn’t want a baby to ruin our relationship but I know if I abort the pregnancy it’s going to ruin everything even faster. I know myself and I know I’m going to blame him and begin to resent him. I know this because it’s already happening. I’m already beginning to feel hostile towards him because I’m feeling like I have no choice in the matter, he decided what was best and that was it, I’m feeling forced and it’s making me pull away from him and distance myself emotionally which is the last thing I need to be doing at a time like this.

I hate that I feel this way about him right now because I love him more than anyone in the world and more than I’ve ever loved anyone. I know he’s trying to be supportive and I know he’s not purposfully trying to force me to do anything but what with the hormones raging, that’s how I’m feeling.

I can’t just get rid of the baby. We knew this could happen and I don’t feel like we can just take the easy way out and move on with our lives like nothing happened. Now I just need to get him on board. If worst comes to worst I can be a single mom, I’m not gonna let him force me to get an abortion if I don’t want it, but I really want him to want this baby and stay with me and be a family. So my question is, how do I convince him that this is the best decision for me?
By the way, adoption is NOT an option

Tags: Abort, abortion pill, Back To School, choice in the matter, emotional effects, fiance, full custody, getting an abortion, heartbeat, love, medical complications, medical procedures, money, pregnancy, Pregnant, pro choice, relationship, steady job

I’ve been with my man for 8yrs and we are expecting our first child in May. For yrs he’s wanted to have children and I declined but now that it’s finally happening he doesn’t truly want it. He went from being a guy who likes to stay home to a guy that wants to go out every weekend. The week of Xmas I found him on a dating website trying to meet girls. He even went as far as to set up a date for Xmas eve! I cant believe he is doing this to me especially since I have so many issues with the pregnancy! I am ready to part ways cuz I wont put up with this crap I just don’t know how to cope with this now, any words of wisdom? Serious answers only please

Tags: crap, dating girls, dating website, eve, girls, How To Deal With Breakup, Meet Girls, pregnancy, Pregnant, words of wisdom, xmas

I have a 4 month old baby and ever since I got pregnant with him my marriage has just gotten worse. My husband insists I stay at home with the baby but also insists on living beyond our means by building a stupid garage that we can’t afford. We can’t hardly buy food or diapers and pay our bills but he insists on buying building supplies on MY credit card (which was only for emergencies). I have told him we can’t afford it, but he just thinks I’m being negative and unreasonable. That is one example. Tonight I was putting our son to bed and he was almost asleep and my husband comes barging in the room to tell me something in a loud voice and woke up the baby. When I Ssh’d him, he made me feel like crap and I ended up apologizing. Those are just two examples, there are a lot worse. We are constantly at each others throat. I don’t want to leave him, but sometimes I feel it’s my only choice.

Please help me. I am so hurt, and angry and sad. I’m typing this because it’s after midnight and my husband said mean things to me (while trying to put the baby to sleep for the 2nd time tonight) and went to bed. I don’t want to sleep next to such a jerk right now.

Tags: Baby Born, Baby Love, Baby Sleep, Baby To Sleep, crap, credit card, diapers, emergencies, loud voice, marriage, month old baby, Pregnant, Sad, sleep, Ssh, Typing

Last year I ended my 8 year marriage to my wife for MANY reason. We were total opposite, and in different places of our lives. My family understood my reasons and were very supportive. Until I started dating again. Shortly after my divorce I started dating Jenn, younger girl from work. We NEVER had any type of relationship before my divorce. We talked now and then but that was it. She is a lot younger then me she is 22 and I am 38. Our relationship went moved very fast, when we were seeing each other for close to 3 months she found out she was pregnant. My family were horrible towards her. My sister called her a home wrecker, gold digger and a child everything she could think of. my brother says I am in a midlife crisis and that our relationship isn’t real. My mother is nice when my girl friend is there but when I am alone she is always saying things like how she is to young or how one day I will wake up and she will be gone with some one her own age. I am happy and that’s what matters. But I know how much it upset Jenn, she wants my family to like her, she wants to be close to them. She has went out of her way to be nice but they are so closed minded that they don’t care.So many times after visit with my family they have made Jenn feel so unwelcomed that she was literally cried on the drive home. I hate seeing her so upset. It is to the point now that I don’t care if we visit them at all. Which makes Jenn feel like it is her fault I am not seeing my family. My sister in law (one of the few family members that is nice to her) asked me if she would mind if she threw us a baby shower (this is the first child for both of us)and my sister was mad about it. I know jenn would love it but at the same time how rude and cold would they be towards her. My daughter is due to be born in a few weeks and I am happy and excited so is Jenn but I am afraid of the way that my family will act. I literally stress out over wondering what they coudl possible say at the hospital to upset her. How can I explain or show them how happy were are as a couple and how much pain they are causing us?

Tags: baby shower, brother, Dating, different places, divorce, family members, girl friend, girlfriend, gold digger, home wrecker, marriage, midlife crisis, Pregnant, relationship, saying things, Sister In Law, younger girl

So about a year ago I went to Africa to visit my family for the summer. And there I met the most incredible guy, and I reeeally liked him but never thought to seriously of it at first because long distance relationship wasn’t even an option in mind. But after he took me on a string of dates I really started to fall in love. He was so sweet and always looked after me….but eventually the time came for me to head back to the u.s. We kept talkin but it was hard. He asked me to marry him but i told him no because i felt it was too early, and that I was too young to make such a serious commitment (i’m 21 now, 20 at the time). Also i was getting alot of pressure from family and friends to move on because of the distance and the fact that i shudnt just up and marry the first guy i dated. So we kept breaking up and getting back together. I went to visit him again for christmas and things were just as if i had never left…But as soon as I came back home the communication had slowed. I was really upset and decided to just break things off for good (cuz i felt like i was young and wasting my life after one guy)….Fast forward two months, I really started to miss him. He seemed like wat every body had to say didn’t matter anymore cuz all i thought about was him, I didn’t care about the other guys taht liked me. At first he was really hesistant to talk to me ( i thought b/c i had hurt him) but he said it was becuz during our break he had slept with his ex and got her pregnant…
This Devastated ME!!! I cried for nights asking God why. Blaming myself more than anything. He treated me like a queen, with unconditional love that no other man has ever shown me, and was my first love. Now it seems like no other man can compare. I still cry myself to sleep thinking about him sumtimes and wishing somehow things could be the way they were…I’ve never been so close to another human being in my life. And it sucks cuz he’s even met my family which is a big deal. And even tho we kept taking breaks I always thought we wud end up together somehow…
Now I’m heartbroken and wonder if I’ll ever find such Love like that again??? Help

Tags: africa, alot, christmas, Cuz, Distance Relationship, family and friends, first love, god, long distance relationship, love, Met, Pregnant, queen, sleep, tho, unconditional love, wasting my life