My husband is going through a really rough time and I am at a lost on how to be supportive. Long story short, he is struggling with the problems of the real world as once upon a time (before me) he lived life in the fast lane and money was easy to obtain. His transition into reality is not going well as he does not fully understand why he cannot get what he wants when he wants it. I’m not sure if it’s so much that he does not understand as oppose to not having the patience. As a result our marriage is suffering. There have been numerous counts of infidelity on his part which obviously puts a strain on the marriage in addition to the other stresses of life. According to him, he is not happy with not being the provider in the home and just not happy with himself as a person so he looks for instant gratification elsewhere. He has recently made an appointment to see a counselor which totally goes against what he believes so maybe he truly is trying to get past this tough time. As for me, money was never and still is not an issue as I was raised to take care of myself and my responsibilities. I am married because I want to be and fell in love, not because I need another income to support me. I do not hound him about not making as much money or not being able to contribute more because I knew what I was getting into when I married him. I knew there would be obstacles and I was fine with that as he is very ambitious and has lots of potential. I don’t know what else to do. When we go out I try to give him my card to swipe or hand the money to him so that it is as if he paid but he does not want to. It insults him if I offer to help him. I am supportive of his business that he is trying to get off of the ground by helping out where he needs it in addition to my full time job and the 4 kids at home. He’s never home so I do it all. Any advice would be appreciated. And no I am not one of those women that think they can fix a man. I did not look at him as needing to be fixed.
It is my problem as well as his, that is why I am asking what more can I do to support him or how can I support him differently. If I looked at it like it were his problem and not mine, we would not have gotten married in the first place.

Tags: appointment, Counselor, Fast Lane, full time job, infidelity, instant gratification, insults, life in the fast lane, love, marriage, money, much money, obstacles, one of those women, patience, real world, rough time, stresses, Suffering, swipe, transition

Are you suffering from the pain of a break up? Do you feel that you would do anything to turn back the clock a few days? If your love’s run out, here’s how to win your ex back.

First of all, don’t go out and chase them. They probably need some space. In fact, often they will come to regret their decision if they aren’t pressured.

That means that you shouldn’t call, text or email them for a week or so. Whatever you do, don’t go begging them to come back. Don’t send flowers or love notes. Instead, hang back and chill.

After a week or so, if your love hasn’t made any contact, it is now okay to do it yourself. But be casual about it. Drop them an email saying “how are you doing?” Again, don’t overdo it. You don’t want to seem too eager.

Just as there is power in romantic relationships, there is a power balance in a break up situation. If you give up your power by chasing your ex, you actually lessen your chances of getting them back.

If the situation was a minor blow up, you may be able to win your ex back by stepping back for a few days and then dropping a casual hint that you are still interested.

But, if a month or so has gone by and you’re still not back together, it’s time to step things up. By this time, he or she has probably started thinking about new partners. Now, it’s time to really learn how to win your ex back.

It is very important not to crowd your ex, even when you are pursuing them. Don’t stalk. It is okay to show up where they hang out from time to time, but be prepared to pay attention to other people besides your ex.

You should also consider contacting your ex from time to time in a casual way. For instance, you could email them saying “I walked by the park where we flew kites that time and it made me think of you. I miss those days.” Also, make sure that you always remember their birthday with a card or small gift. This will let them know that they are still on your radar.

One controversial tactic is to ask one of your ex’s friends out on a date. Then text your ex and ask him or her where the friend would like to go on the date. This will make your ex think that you are moving on and make him or her question whether they really want to be broken up.

It is okay to date other people while you are broken up, but you should refrain from sleeping with them. Your ex may consider this a final sign that the relationship is over. So, be true to your love even though you have broken up.

And that is how to win your ex back.

Tags: Back Pain, Break, Break Up, Chill, Clock, Contac, email, flowers, Love Notes, Power Balance, Romantic Relationships, Send Flowers, Suffering, T Amp